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astralisCriminal Minds makes me exquisitely happy.
It also, apparently, makes me write threesome porn. Surprised the hell out of me, that did.
Anyway.
TITLE: in the land of the living
PAIRING: JJ/Morgan/Prentiss
RATING: NC-17
NOTES: tag to 'Identity'
WARNINGS: possible consent issues
"in the land of the living"
It's late when they get back to Quantico. So much the better, JJ thinks. That means they don't have to hang around here, doing paperwork and trying to find something to talk about. The case is over, done, still too close to talk about. No one has anything to say on nights like this.
JJ doesn't look at Prentiss. Doesn't look at Morgan, either. If she knows, so do they. Somehow they've figured out a way to understand each other. She goes home, changes clothes, touches up her makeup. God knows why. It doesn't matter. She gets a cab to the bar so she doesn't have a car to worry about later. She's got good at this.
The others are already there, sitting at a table in the corner with three drinks in front of them, all untouched. Jen slips into the empty chair. No one says anything. Around them, the music rages, people dance, laugh, bicker.
Jen likes these places. It's easy to be anonymous here, to be someone Agent Jareau would never recognise. No one's watching, no one cares.
Emily picks up her drink. It's all first names tonight, Emily and Derek and Jen. Jen knows what Derek and Emily could say about that. They never do. “Cheers,” she says. They touch glasses. Jen's fingers slide against Derek's and she wraps them tighter around her glass before taking her first mouthful. Vodka and tonic. They know what she drinks when she wants to get drunk, just like she knows Emily drinks margaritas and Derek drinks European beers.
Jen knows lots of things.
Four or five drinks later, Emily's giggling and rubbing her foot up and down Jen's calf, safely hidden under the table. Jen swallows and shivers and doesn't dare look at her. She looks at Derek instead and he smiles, tucks her hair back behind her ear.
Jen swallows again. She puts a hand over Derek's and he turns his palm to let her hand rest in his. He squeezes it and holds tight. That's better. She's always nervous, nights like this. She's pretty sure she's not the only one.
Emily looks at them, and runs her foot higher up Jen's leg. “You guys ready to go?”
Derek says, “I'll call us a cab.”
They always go back to his place, just like they always go to the same bar, just like Jen always wears the same black lace panties that she knows Derek likes. Routine, predictable: stupid. But there are some habits you just can't break.
Habits like this.
Derek lets them in. Jen and Emily take off their shoes in the entranceway and pad down the hallway in bare feet. It makes Jen feel like a teenager again, sneaking in, hiding. They fall onto the sofa, Emily comfortably in the crook of Jen's arm, and Derek pours them each a glass of red wine. “Ladies,” he says, passing them one each, and Emily splashes hers, giggling. Jen's thankful she's wearing black.
It's gone midnight, and they have to work tomorrow. Jen doesn't care at the moment. She'll care in the morning.
Emily starts it, the way she did the first time, the way she's done every time since. She runs a hand up the back of Derek's neck, cups his head and draws him in to kiss her. Jen watches, clutching her glass. She's got a perfect view from here and it's mesmerising, the way their lips move against each other. More than anything else, Jen thinks, that's what turns her on.
When Emily's hand drops from Derek's head, it's Jen's turn. He leans over Emily and kisses her, his tongue sliding into her mouth. Jen can taste Emily's lip gloss. She's pressing up against Derek and Emily's beside her, her breathing already rough and harsh, one hand gripping Jen's arm.
This is how they cope.
Emily says “My turn,” and Derek pulls away after one last kiss. Jen opens her eyes, disappointed, but then Emily's face is right there and Jen has to touch her, has to stroke her cheek, and then Emily's tossing her hair back and straddling Jen, and kissing her, her thighs warm on Jen's. Derek stands behind Emily and runs his hands up her body, pulling her shirt up as he goes. Emily has to break the kiss to let him pull it over her head; she raises her arms gracefully and looks at Jen with the wicked grin that makes her shiver. Her nipples are hard under the red lace of her bra. Jen has to swallow again to stop herself saying something cliched and gives into the urge to run her hands down the soft white skin of Emily's back, over the top of her jeans and down onto her ass. Derek gets her bra off and he kisses Emily's neck as he cups her breasts, rolling her nipples between thumb and forefinger.
Jen looks up at him. He catches her eye, gives her a long, slow smile as Emily arches her back, tightening her thighs around Jen's. They're all, Jen thinks in some far away part of her mind, wearing too many clothes. She brings her hands round and sets to work at the button on Emily's jeans. If she fumbles a bit, it's only because she's distracted by the noise Emily makes when Derek leans down and starts kissing her shoulder. She gets the button undone, pulls down the zipper and slides her hand in. Emily's wearing silk panties and she bites her lip at the touch of Jen's hand. Jen would love to explore further, but her wrist's already aching. “I think we need to take this elsewhere,” she says, surprised, as always, by the fact that her voice still works.
Emily just whimpers, but Derek says “bedroom,” and pulls Emily to her feet. Emily leans back against him, her eyes half closed. Jen thinks, without meaning to, God she's sexy, and seizes the opportunity to remove Emily's pants, leaving her in nothing but a pair of panties that match the bra she was wearing earlier. Emily steps out of them automatically and demands to know why she's the only naked one.
“You're not, yet.” Derek has that wicked tone in his voice, the one that makes Jen quiver at the knees. “Do you want to be?”
Emily just laughs. She takes Jen's hand in one of her own and Derek's in the other and tows them to the bedroom, walking backwards and barely stumbling. She knows the way, after all. She doesn't stop until she's reached the bed and pulled them all down on it.
Derek's ended up in the middle, flat on his back. Emily grins at Jen, kisses Derek hard on the lips, and then goes straight for his belt buckle. Jen's always slower about these things; she prefers to kiss him slower, to feel his hand on the back of his head. If Emily's sexy then Derek's just plain hot, and Jen's not opposed to taking her time. This happens infrequently enough that she needs to savour it when it does. She works Derek's shirt up his body as Emily pushes his pants and boxers down, and between the two of them they get his clothes off. Derek's smiling at Jen and making Emily gasp by rubbing his hand up the inside of her thighs, and Jen's brain might be about to fall out.
Her hand meets Emily's on Derek's cock as he mutters something incomprehensible. At least she's not alone in the brain-falling-out thing. She lets her fingers trail down to the base of his cock and back up to the tip, brushing against Emily's fingers again on the way, and meeting her eyes. Emily's grinning. “Now who's naked?” she asks, doing something with her hand that makes Derek groan, and makes Jen need to bite her lip.
“I think Jen needs to be,” he says, and before Jen can react he's pulled her into the middle so she's got a naked (nearly-naked) body pressed up against either side of her. Emily's hand is on her breasts and Derek's is between her legs and Jen can barely breathe as they strip her. It's all she can do just to help where they need it, and at some point Emily's panties end up coming off too and Jen honestly couldn't tell which of them was responsible for that. Could well have been her.
There's lots of hands and kissing and moaning, and somehow Emily's managed to get herself into the middle. Jen thinks it might have been when Emily was on top of her and kissing her, but she really doesn't care. She's not really thinking with her brain. She licks and kisses her way down Emily's body. This is Emily's favourite part, and quite possibly Jen's, too. Derek's kissing Emily, muffling her moans, but Jen can still tell exactly how much Emily likes what she's doing.
Jen repositions herself between Emily's legs. She touches, gently, feels how wet Emily is. She slides a finger inside, lowers her head and probes softly with her tongue. She's never done this to anyone other than Emily and every time she does this she wonders if other women taste like this, taste the Emily does, would make her feel the way Emily does. Emily thrusts her hips up as Jen finds her clit and Jen knows she's not going to last long.
And they're just getting started.
Derek must have stopped kissing her, because Emily's moans become sharper and clearer and sometimes Jen can make out their names. She risks a glance upward and see Derek's mouth on one of Emily's breasts. Oh, yeah. Emily's definitely not going to last long. Jen slides another finger in. Emily says “Jen,” her voice high-pitched and strange.
She's close.
Jen speeds up her movements, a little light-headed herself, devoutly hoping it's going to be her turn next.
Emily cries out as she comes, back arched, her ass lifting off the bed. Jen sits back and watches her, aware of Derek doing the same thing and of the ache down between her own legs.
Emily's been losing weight, Jen thinks. She shouldn't be, but now's not the time to worry, not when Emily's lying in a blissful heap, eyes closed. She's beautiful. “I love you guys,” Emily says, and for a second Jen wishes that she'd said it another way, that she hadn't said it in the way she might say I love coffee.
Just for a second, in another life.
“Was that good?” Derek asks, teasing, and Emily opens her eyes to grin at him.
“You know it was,” she says, and Jen can't help laughing. Emily looks from Derek to Jen and back again, still breathing hard in the aftermath of her orgasm. Hinting. You can count on Emily for that, Jen thinks, just a little embarrassed and wondering if her need is written all over her face.
Derek tucks Jen's hair behind her ear, and their eyes meet. “You want this?” he asks, his palm lingering on her cheek, looking at her like he thinks she's beautiful.
Jen nods, knowing what he means, wanting it so much it hurts.
“Let me get out of your way,” Emily says, lazily, and swaps places with Derek.
Jen lies stock-still, looking at him. God. This isn't her life. She feels his hand on her thigh, warm and rough. “Hey, baby,” he says, smiling, gently teasing her clit with a finger. God, she's wet, and it's all she can do not to come then and there. Apparently she's still got some self-control left.
“Hey.”
Derek kisses her thigh, just light enough to tickle, and leans over to rummage in a drawer for a condom. Jen watches as he slides it on, and holds her breath as he swings a leg over her. “You ready?”
“Yeah. You bet.”
Derek slides into her slowly, eyes locked on Jen's the whole time. She's going to burst, she's going to come, she's going to lose control completely, but then Derek's inside her and on top of her and it's wonderful. She hooks her legs around his, wraps her arms around him, and for a second he's still. He kisses her lips and she knows he's tasting Emily, but then he kisses her forehead and she knows that's all about her.
It's crazy how she needs this to feel good again, how they all need this to feel alive. This is what they're doing, after all: living. For once in their lives, actually living. Jen wasn't up there on that mountain with them, didn't see Becky lying in the dirt or Henry Frost's dead body, but she saw the torture instruments and the video tapes and that's enough to make something fall apart inside of her. This is what she needs to put herself back together, and it's screwed up and it's wrong and right now she doesn't care.
Derek kisses her again and starts to move, and Jen shuts her eyes tight, focusing on the sensations, on Derek's breath on her face and the little noises he makes and on Emily breathing beside them, because Jen can't ever forget that there are three of them in this. She knows that in the morning he'll have the marks of her fingernails in the skin on his back, but she's borne the marks of his teeth before, red against the white of her collarbone. If Emily sees the marks in the morning she'll tease both of them, but for now -
For now she feels alive. Tomorrow she'll wake up feeling whole. It's enough. She holds Derek tighter, clinging to him and moving with him. He needs this like she does. She can feel it.
Emily's whimpering, somewhere close to Jen's ear, and Jen pulls herself out of the world of feeling to look sideways. Emily's touching herself, and she's beautiful. Derek's eyes follow Jen's. “You like that,” he whispers. It's not a question, and Jen's whole body tenses.
“So do you,” she says, not quite admitting it. Emily laughs, and Derek smiles and kisses her again, and then he grabs Jen's hips and rolls them over so she's on top. It's obvious what he's getting at and Jen doesn't mind in the least, so she sits up, her knees either side of his waist, and finds her rhythm again. She can watch both of them, like this: Derek with his eyes half closed, and Emily. Emily.
Jen was missing something all those years she thought she was straight.
Emily comes hard, biting her lip and shaking, and it's almost enough to push Jen over the edge too. Instead, she doesn't think about Will, or about how they have to work together, and how this is a thousand different shades of inappropriate, or how, sooner or later, this is going to come out, because secrets never stay buried, her mind rippling out on tangents, separating itself from her body.
Emily says “Jen, stop thinking,” and then next thing Jen knows Emily's behind her, body pressed close behind hers, and there's one hand on her breast and the other's sliding down to her clit. And then she has to stop thinking, because dammit, between the two of them she can barely even breathe right now. She sees Derek's grin and knows that it's for what Emily's doing, and she doesn't care.
Jen comes in a rush, acutely aware of her body, of Derek underneath her and Emily behind her. Derek comes right after she does, his eyes squeezed tight shut, fingers digging into her hips. “Jen – God -” he says, and she'd make the tired old joke about her name not being God, but she can't talk at the moment.
Emily helps her off and the two of them fall over sideways. Emily laughs first and Jen catches her giggles, landing with Emily's arm around her waist. She's perfectly happy to lie there like that as Derek grins affectionately at them, kisses them both and gets up, padding into the bathroom. A minute later Jen hears the toilet flush and the water running, and then he comes back out and gets into bed, pulling the covers over the top of them. He fiddles with his alarm clock and then turns out the light.
Jen lies there in the peaceful darkness, listening to them breathing, feeling the rise and fall of Emily's chest and Derek's breath against her skin. This has to be worth it. It has to be.
It's all she's got.
She falls asleep between them, and sleeps without dreaming.
***
Derek's alarm clock goes off in plenty of time for Jen and Emily to go home and change before work. He's always been good like that, thoughtful and considerate, the one who acts like this might actually be normal.
When the alarm sounds, Emily mutters something under her breath and pushes her face into Jen's neck. Half-asleep, warm and comfortable, Jen agrees with the sentiment, and kisses the hollow of Derek's shoulder as he reaches for the alarm. She's almost deafened by the sudden silence when he turns it off.
It's over again. They'll go home and they'll pretend this never happened and they'll all promise themselves it'll never happen again, and they'll pretend they believe it until the next time.
Derek goes off to make coffee, and Jen hauls Emily out of bed and they dress in last night's clothes. Everything smells like sex, Jen thinks, and she welcomes the sharp smell of coffee she finds when she follows Emily down to the kitchen.
Derek calls for their cabs, and they avoid each other's eyes as they drink the coffee. No one says goodbye.
***
JJ arrives at work right on time and she's still the last one there. She passes Hotch and Rossi standing in the doorway intently discussing some aspect of their last case, and throws a casual glance around the bullpen. Prentiss is knee-deep in paperwork already, but Morgan's talking to Reid, who's perched on the edge of his desk twirling a pencil between his fingers.
JJ waves at the room in general, and passes Garcia on the way to grab herself another coffee. “Late night?” Garcia asks.
JJ smiles, and looks away. “You could say that.”
It also, apparently, makes me write threesome porn. Surprised the hell out of me, that did.
Anyway.
TITLE: in the land of the living
PAIRING: JJ/Morgan/Prentiss
RATING: NC-17
NOTES: tag to 'Identity'
WARNINGS: possible consent issues
"in the land of the living"
It's late when they get back to Quantico. So much the better, JJ thinks. That means they don't have to hang around here, doing paperwork and trying to find something to talk about. The case is over, done, still too close to talk about. No one has anything to say on nights like this.
JJ doesn't look at Prentiss. Doesn't look at Morgan, either. If she knows, so do they. Somehow they've figured out a way to understand each other. She goes home, changes clothes, touches up her makeup. God knows why. It doesn't matter. She gets a cab to the bar so she doesn't have a car to worry about later. She's got good at this.
The others are already there, sitting at a table in the corner with three drinks in front of them, all untouched. Jen slips into the empty chair. No one says anything. Around them, the music rages, people dance, laugh, bicker.
Jen likes these places. It's easy to be anonymous here, to be someone Agent Jareau would never recognise. No one's watching, no one cares.
Emily picks up her drink. It's all first names tonight, Emily and Derek and Jen. Jen knows what Derek and Emily could say about that. They never do. “Cheers,” she says. They touch glasses. Jen's fingers slide against Derek's and she wraps them tighter around her glass before taking her first mouthful. Vodka and tonic. They know what she drinks when she wants to get drunk, just like she knows Emily drinks margaritas and Derek drinks European beers.
Jen knows lots of things.
Four or five drinks later, Emily's giggling and rubbing her foot up and down Jen's calf, safely hidden under the table. Jen swallows and shivers and doesn't dare look at her. She looks at Derek instead and he smiles, tucks her hair back behind her ear.
Jen swallows again. She puts a hand over Derek's and he turns his palm to let her hand rest in his. He squeezes it and holds tight. That's better. She's always nervous, nights like this. She's pretty sure she's not the only one.
Emily looks at them, and runs her foot higher up Jen's leg. “You guys ready to go?”
Derek says, “I'll call us a cab.”
They always go back to his place, just like they always go to the same bar, just like Jen always wears the same black lace panties that she knows Derek likes. Routine, predictable: stupid. But there are some habits you just can't break.
Habits like this.
Derek lets them in. Jen and Emily take off their shoes in the entranceway and pad down the hallway in bare feet. It makes Jen feel like a teenager again, sneaking in, hiding. They fall onto the sofa, Emily comfortably in the crook of Jen's arm, and Derek pours them each a glass of red wine. “Ladies,” he says, passing them one each, and Emily splashes hers, giggling. Jen's thankful she's wearing black.
It's gone midnight, and they have to work tomorrow. Jen doesn't care at the moment. She'll care in the morning.
Emily starts it, the way she did the first time, the way she's done every time since. She runs a hand up the back of Derek's neck, cups his head and draws him in to kiss her. Jen watches, clutching her glass. She's got a perfect view from here and it's mesmerising, the way their lips move against each other. More than anything else, Jen thinks, that's what turns her on.
When Emily's hand drops from Derek's head, it's Jen's turn. He leans over Emily and kisses her, his tongue sliding into her mouth. Jen can taste Emily's lip gloss. She's pressing up against Derek and Emily's beside her, her breathing already rough and harsh, one hand gripping Jen's arm.
This is how they cope.
Emily says “My turn,” and Derek pulls away after one last kiss. Jen opens her eyes, disappointed, but then Emily's face is right there and Jen has to touch her, has to stroke her cheek, and then Emily's tossing her hair back and straddling Jen, and kissing her, her thighs warm on Jen's. Derek stands behind Emily and runs his hands up her body, pulling her shirt up as he goes. Emily has to break the kiss to let him pull it over her head; she raises her arms gracefully and looks at Jen with the wicked grin that makes her shiver. Her nipples are hard under the red lace of her bra. Jen has to swallow again to stop herself saying something cliched and gives into the urge to run her hands down the soft white skin of Emily's back, over the top of her jeans and down onto her ass. Derek gets her bra off and he kisses Emily's neck as he cups her breasts, rolling her nipples between thumb and forefinger.
Jen looks up at him. He catches her eye, gives her a long, slow smile as Emily arches her back, tightening her thighs around Jen's. They're all, Jen thinks in some far away part of her mind, wearing too many clothes. She brings her hands round and sets to work at the button on Emily's jeans. If she fumbles a bit, it's only because she's distracted by the noise Emily makes when Derek leans down and starts kissing her shoulder. She gets the button undone, pulls down the zipper and slides her hand in. Emily's wearing silk panties and she bites her lip at the touch of Jen's hand. Jen would love to explore further, but her wrist's already aching. “I think we need to take this elsewhere,” she says, surprised, as always, by the fact that her voice still works.
Emily just whimpers, but Derek says “bedroom,” and pulls Emily to her feet. Emily leans back against him, her eyes half closed. Jen thinks, without meaning to, God she's sexy, and seizes the opportunity to remove Emily's pants, leaving her in nothing but a pair of panties that match the bra she was wearing earlier. Emily steps out of them automatically and demands to know why she's the only naked one.
“You're not, yet.” Derek has that wicked tone in his voice, the one that makes Jen quiver at the knees. “Do you want to be?”
Emily just laughs. She takes Jen's hand in one of her own and Derek's in the other and tows them to the bedroom, walking backwards and barely stumbling. She knows the way, after all. She doesn't stop until she's reached the bed and pulled them all down on it.
Derek's ended up in the middle, flat on his back. Emily grins at Jen, kisses Derek hard on the lips, and then goes straight for his belt buckle. Jen's always slower about these things; she prefers to kiss him slower, to feel his hand on the back of his head. If Emily's sexy then Derek's just plain hot, and Jen's not opposed to taking her time. This happens infrequently enough that she needs to savour it when it does. She works Derek's shirt up his body as Emily pushes his pants and boxers down, and between the two of them they get his clothes off. Derek's smiling at Jen and making Emily gasp by rubbing his hand up the inside of her thighs, and Jen's brain might be about to fall out.
Her hand meets Emily's on Derek's cock as he mutters something incomprehensible. At least she's not alone in the brain-falling-out thing. She lets her fingers trail down to the base of his cock and back up to the tip, brushing against Emily's fingers again on the way, and meeting her eyes. Emily's grinning. “Now who's naked?” she asks, doing something with her hand that makes Derek groan, and makes Jen need to bite her lip.
“I think Jen needs to be,” he says, and before Jen can react he's pulled her into the middle so she's got a naked (nearly-naked) body pressed up against either side of her. Emily's hand is on her breasts and Derek's is between her legs and Jen can barely breathe as they strip her. It's all she can do just to help where they need it, and at some point Emily's panties end up coming off too and Jen honestly couldn't tell which of them was responsible for that. Could well have been her.
There's lots of hands and kissing and moaning, and somehow Emily's managed to get herself into the middle. Jen thinks it might have been when Emily was on top of her and kissing her, but she really doesn't care. She's not really thinking with her brain. She licks and kisses her way down Emily's body. This is Emily's favourite part, and quite possibly Jen's, too. Derek's kissing Emily, muffling her moans, but Jen can still tell exactly how much Emily likes what she's doing.
Jen repositions herself between Emily's legs. She touches, gently, feels how wet Emily is. She slides a finger inside, lowers her head and probes softly with her tongue. She's never done this to anyone other than Emily and every time she does this she wonders if other women taste like this, taste the Emily does, would make her feel the way Emily does. Emily thrusts her hips up as Jen finds her clit and Jen knows she's not going to last long.
And they're just getting started.
Derek must have stopped kissing her, because Emily's moans become sharper and clearer and sometimes Jen can make out their names. She risks a glance upward and see Derek's mouth on one of Emily's breasts. Oh, yeah. Emily's definitely not going to last long. Jen slides another finger in. Emily says “Jen,” her voice high-pitched and strange.
She's close.
Jen speeds up her movements, a little light-headed herself, devoutly hoping it's going to be her turn next.
Emily cries out as she comes, back arched, her ass lifting off the bed. Jen sits back and watches her, aware of Derek doing the same thing and of the ache down between her own legs.
Emily's been losing weight, Jen thinks. She shouldn't be, but now's not the time to worry, not when Emily's lying in a blissful heap, eyes closed. She's beautiful. “I love you guys,” Emily says, and for a second Jen wishes that she'd said it another way, that she hadn't said it in the way she might say I love coffee.
Just for a second, in another life.
“Was that good?” Derek asks, teasing, and Emily opens her eyes to grin at him.
“You know it was,” she says, and Jen can't help laughing. Emily looks from Derek to Jen and back again, still breathing hard in the aftermath of her orgasm. Hinting. You can count on Emily for that, Jen thinks, just a little embarrassed and wondering if her need is written all over her face.
Derek tucks Jen's hair behind her ear, and their eyes meet. “You want this?” he asks, his palm lingering on her cheek, looking at her like he thinks she's beautiful.
Jen nods, knowing what he means, wanting it so much it hurts.
“Let me get out of your way,” Emily says, lazily, and swaps places with Derek.
Jen lies stock-still, looking at him. God. This isn't her life. She feels his hand on her thigh, warm and rough. “Hey, baby,” he says, smiling, gently teasing her clit with a finger. God, she's wet, and it's all she can do not to come then and there. Apparently she's still got some self-control left.
“Hey.”
Derek kisses her thigh, just light enough to tickle, and leans over to rummage in a drawer for a condom. Jen watches as he slides it on, and holds her breath as he swings a leg over her. “You ready?”
“Yeah. You bet.”
Derek slides into her slowly, eyes locked on Jen's the whole time. She's going to burst, she's going to come, she's going to lose control completely, but then Derek's inside her and on top of her and it's wonderful. She hooks her legs around his, wraps her arms around him, and for a second he's still. He kisses her lips and she knows he's tasting Emily, but then he kisses her forehead and she knows that's all about her.
It's crazy how she needs this to feel good again, how they all need this to feel alive. This is what they're doing, after all: living. For once in their lives, actually living. Jen wasn't up there on that mountain with them, didn't see Becky lying in the dirt or Henry Frost's dead body, but she saw the torture instruments and the video tapes and that's enough to make something fall apart inside of her. This is what she needs to put herself back together, and it's screwed up and it's wrong and right now she doesn't care.
Derek kisses her again and starts to move, and Jen shuts her eyes tight, focusing on the sensations, on Derek's breath on her face and the little noises he makes and on Emily breathing beside them, because Jen can't ever forget that there are three of them in this. She knows that in the morning he'll have the marks of her fingernails in the skin on his back, but she's borne the marks of his teeth before, red against the white of her collarbone. If Emily sees the marks in the morning she'll tease both of them, but for now -
For now she feels alive. Tomorrow she'll wake up feeling whole. It's enough. She holds Derek tighter, clinging to him and moving with him. He needs this like she does. She can feel it.
Emily's whimpering, somewhere close to Jen's ear, and Jen pulls herself out of the world of feeling to look sideways. Emily's touching herself, and she's beautiful. Derek's eyes follow Jen's. “You like that,” he whispers. It's not a question, and Jen's whole body tenses.
“So do you,” she says, not quite admitting it. Emily laughs, and Derek smiles and kisses her again, and then he grabs Jen's hips and rolls them over so she's on top. It's obvious what he's getting at and Jen doesn't mind in the least, so she sits up, her knees either side of his waist, and finds her rhythm again. She can watch both of them, like this: Derek with his eyes half closed, and Emily. Emily.
Jen was missing something all those years she thought she was straight.
Emily comes hard, biting her lip and shaking, and it's almost enough to push Jen over the edge too. Instead, she doesn't think about Will, or about how they have to work together, and how this is a thousand different shades of inappropriate, or how, sooner or later, this is going to come out, because secrets never stay buried, her mind rippling out on tangents, separating itself from her body.
Emily says “Jen, stop thinking,” and then next thing Jen knows Emily's behind her, body pressed close behind hers, and there's one hand on her breast and the other's sliding down to her clit. And then she has to stop thinking, because dammit, between the two of them she can barely even breathe right now. She sees Derek's grin and knows that it's for what Emily's doing, and she doesn't care.
Jen comes in a rush, acutely aware of her body, of Derek underneath her and Emily behind her. Derek comes right after she does, his eyes squeezed tight shut, fingers digging into her hips. “Jen – God -” he says, and she'd make the tired old joke about her name not being God, but she can't talk at the moment.
Emily helps her off and the two of them fall over sideways. Emily laughs first and Jen catches her giggles, landing with Emily's arm around her waist. She's perfectly happy to lie there like that as Derek grins affectionately at them, kisses them both and gets up, padding into the bathroom. A minute later Jen hears the toilet flush and the water running, and then he comes back out and gets into bed, pulling the covers over the top of them. He fiddles with his alarm clock and then turns out the light.
Jen lies there in the peaceful darkness, listening to them breathing, feeling the rise and fall of Emily's chest and Derek's breath against her skin. This has to be worth it. It has to be.
It's all she's got.
She falls asleep between them, and sleeps without dreaming.
***
Derek's alarm clock goes off in plenty of time for Jen and Emily to go home and change before work. He's always been good like that, thoughtful and considerate, the one who acts like this might actually be normal.
When the alarm sounds, Emily mutters something under her breath and pushes her face into Jen's neck. Half-asleep, warm and comfortable, Jen agrees with the sentiment, and kisses the hollow of Derek's shoulder as he reaches for the alarm. She's almost deafened by the sudden silence when he turns it off.
It's over again. They'll go home and they'll pretend this never happened and they'll all promise themselves it'll never happen again, and they'll pretend they believe it until the next time.
Derek goes off to make coffee, and Jen hauls Emily out of bed and they dress in last night's clothes. Everything smells like sex, Jen thinks, and she welcomes the sharp smell of coffee she finds when she follows Emily down to the kitchen.
Derek calls for their cabs, and they avoid each other's eyes as they drink the coffee. No one says goodbye.
***
JJ arrives at work right on time and she's still the last one there. She passes Hotch and Rossi standing in the doorway intently discussing some aspect of their last case, and throws a casual glance around the bullpen. Prentiss is knee-deep in paperwork already, but Morgan's talking to Reid, who's perched on the edge of his desk twirling a pencil between his fingers.
JJ waves at the room in general, and passes Garcia on the way to grab herself another coffee. “Late night?” Garcia asks.
JJ smiles, and looks away. “You could say that.”
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Date: 2008-09-05 09:41 pm (UTC)ps, i'd SO bribe you with fic and/or cookies to read another one of these...
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Date: 2008-09-05 10:17 pm (UTC)I have a few plotbunnies nibbling away at my brain, so there might be more if I can get past my chronic inability to finish things I start.
(ps - Firefly fan?)
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Date: 2008-09-06 02:20 am (UTC)I have a few plotbunnies nibbling away at my brain, so there might be more if I can get past my chronic inability to finish things I start. I will SO be your cheerleader if it gets me more JJ/Emily/Morgan, lol!
And yes, I'm a HUGE Firefly fan! ZOMG! I just got back from my fourth Dragon*Con and even though I'm so incredibly gay having Nathan Fillion say, "Well hello there, sweet thing!" just about melted me. Lol! Plus, Nathan and Morena KISSED!!!! *SQUEE* Dragon*Con rocks!
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Date: 2008-09-08 05:24 am (UTC)But omg, there might be more? Seriously? Maybe :) Of course, I'm actually supposed to be writing a fic for
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Date: 2008-09-06 04:18 pm (UTC)And all the more fascinating because it's from JJ's perspective. I would love to see more of these three.
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Date: 2008-09-08 05:31 am (UTC)I'm glad you enjoyed it.
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Date: 2008-09-08 03:50 pm (UTC)~ Scarlet
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Date: 2008-09-08 10:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-14 08:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-15 04:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-29 02:10 am (UTC)memzing this. <3